You know when you go through your camera roll to delete pictures of crap to make space for photos of more crap? I do it regularly, by the end of the year my camera roll is a distilled stream of snapshots of memorable moments through the year.
This pic is probably the most poignant for me. It’s a pic of me on West Wittering beach. Debs took it on Sunday 5th of October. It was Deb’s idea to get the bus to the beach and go for a walk. I’d spent the previous 2 weeks worrying myself sick about losing Miss Somerset, Debs wanted me to think about something else for a couple of hours. It didn’t work, all I wanted to do was talk about what I could do to fix things, what words I could say to make it work. It was so hard because I didn’t know what went wrong. It’s difficult to find a solution when you don’t know what the problem is.
When I wasn’t thinking about Miss Somerset I was worrying about Mum, it was becoming obvious that she was losing her life to that cancer bastard and each visit to the hospice was getting more difficult to see her.
The following week both situations came to their conclusion. I look at this pic and reminded of how helpless I felt at the time, how I was constantly sighing, what a ball of worry I was. I think for this week alone 2014 can go fuck itself.
I look alone in this picture but of course I wasn’t, I was with a friend and it was friends that got me through that shit of a few weeks, so thank you friends.
Let’s have a great 2015, that would be nice. Happy new year everyone.